Category Archives: Musings

Vintage? Try again.

East Side Bride has a great guest post up from Noa of Feather Love Photography about the overabundant use of the word vintage in today’s weddingland. 

I know I used it at least once or twice during our planning. And I see it everywhere. In blog titles, in descriptions of products on Etsy or other sites. On photographer’s blogs describing their style. EVERYWHERE.

Before you start throwing it around like it ain’t no one’s bidness, plz read what Noa has to say.

Photo via Pinterest via The Daily Oyster via Vogue Nov. 2005

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Half-iversary.

Well, we’re halfway there to a whole damn year. Many of my favorite blogs are doing a roundup of posts, or best of’s or sumthin’ sumthin’ of that sort.

But, considering just six months ago we took the plunge, tied the knot, got wedinated, I thought it more apt to talk about that.

In the 184 days since that radtastic day on the beach in Hawaii, there’s been a lot of momentum in the Moynihan-Hunter household:

We got a new apartment, just the three of us.

– I got a promotion.

– We both turned 27.

– We had our first Thanksgiving together.

– We shared our first New Year’s kiss.

-We met some amazing friends, and watched those amazing friends move away.

– I got a gig contributing to one of my favorite blogs.

– One of our good friends got engaged.

– Said friend became a dad for a second time.

WE RELEASED A SEA TURTLE.

– And we’ve grown closer, day by day.

There have been adventures, some good, some bad, that have arisen in our journey together in the last six months. I hope every day will hold the promise and opportunity of us building our bond and enjoying every minute together.

Happy Half-iversary, love.

Top photo: Persimmon Images.

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Tough.

Throughout the engagement and planning process, much like the question we hear now, nearly everyone around us would ask us the same thing, or a variant of such:

How are you doing?

How are you feeling?

Are you nervous/anxious/ready?

We understood it was all well-intentioned.

During the earlier stages, the question was one that would invite a lengthy response which usually corresponded with more intricate details about plans, ideas, giddiness, etc.

However in the immediate days prior, it became like that damn mosquito that hovers near your ear when you’re trying to sleep, just to flit out of reach as you go to conquer it.

It felt as though every time someone asked us, we melted a little more, and not in a good way.

This all came to a head the night before, during a joint family barbeque put on by mi familia. We were tired, frazzled, anxious, overwhelmed, underwhelmed … we were, indeed, ALL THE THINGS.

We appreciated, and still do, everything everyone did for us. But at that point, we’d traveled for three days, had reunions galore from halfway around the world, partied for our hens and stags, missed one marriage license appointment, had another that very morning, finalized all the details, had some miscommunication meltdowns with the coordinator, done a run-through, were under pressure to see everyone we hadn’t, got lost on the way to the barbeque and here we were. With many asking us how we were feeling.

Cue: Meltdown.

It, unfortunately, was one of my sweet, poor, unsuspecting aunts who triggered it. Luckily, she’s got a good head on her shoulders and took it quite well when I turned to her and said:

“Quite honestly, if one more person asks me that question, I’m going to lose it.”

I then stepped away, with Aussie, and cried. Not for being sad, not for being scared. Just for being so overwrought with emotion and stress and pressure. We tried to return to the party, but we couldn’t even finish a beer. A sure sign we were finito.

Luckily, our amazing photographers who’d been there, done that, and my super awesome pseudo-mama, Sooz, took notice. The three came over and told us, under no uncertain terms, that it was quite all right for us to bow out and go back to the hotel.

So we did.

We flopped on our bed, curled up together and just stared. After a while we put on an episode of whatever show we were watching at the time. And we passed out.

We really did appreciate all the concern and checking in, but weddings are hard. I’m happy we didn’t go ‘zilla, but it wasn’t a graceful moment.

Planning weddings is stressful. Being around a ton of family and friends, especially when you haven’t seen them in a while, can be stressful. Add all the elements together? It’s a recipe for implosion.

We survived, obviously, and being with our friends the next morning helped to ease the tension.

We learned, through this experience, that even though we knew the wedding wasn’t about just us, nor was it just about our families, etc., it was about weathering the storm together. It was likely (maybe with the exception of a moment or two during the hens/stags) our most graceless moment, and one I’m not happy about.

But, it did set up boundaries, boundaries we badly needed. We needed to step away and just have some us time, time we hadn’t been able to have up until that point. It’s unfortunate it took that moment, those actions, for us to realize it, but that set up a template for us to be able to recognize it in the future. Which makes knowing what we need, what our boundaries are, not so tough right now.

Juju Ivanyuk by Ben Hassett for Numéro #128 on Fashion Gone Rogue
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Uh .

I’m not really sure what this is trying to convey, as it looks more like he’s wearing gray than white, so it reads to me like he’ll only say those things if she wears white to their wedding, and it’s not a mutual thing where they both wear white … etc. It makes me uncomfortable, but I know it’s trying to be sweet.

Thoughts?

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Question.

I’ve been hearing the same inquiry a lot lately.

“How’s married life?”

I have the same standard answer.

The same. Just an extra piece of jewelry.

It’s an answer that gets me out of a lot of inane small talk and allows the conversation to move forward.

But … it’s not the whole truth. It’s not a lie, but it’s an easy brush-over.

The truth is … it’s easier.

There’s a serenity. I mean, the “extra piece of jewelry” response is pretty fitting, because it’s an easy answer. But life is easier. There’s never a moment of pseudo-panic during a fight where I start hyperventilating. There’s uber rare occurrences of psycho pissed-offness.

Also, because we lived together before we were married, and even though now it’s just the two (three) of us, we know each other. We know the asinine habits, the annoying quirks, the endearing touches, the OCD … or lack thereof. It’s not a new adjustment on top of a new adjustment.

It’s just an extra piece of jewelry … and that spare room full of crap.

In short, we just have to move past whatever is not conducive to the cut of our jib. We have to. Because we made that promise. So while it may be momentarily hard, in the long run, it’s easier. And that’s the absolute glory of making that commitment. It makes the hard stuff easier.

Photo: Persimmon Images. My most ‘derrrrp’ moment in the entire collection. Also? I love that Shan and Sooz are looking at me, horrified.

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Watch.

Couple Time. They’re about a minute-and-a-half-long shorts that are awkwardly hilarious.

Starring Patrick Carlyle and Allyn Rachel

PS: Doesn’t her name seem a little backward? I like.

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(P)interesting.

I just joined. Maybe out of curiosity. Maybe out of need for inspiration.

HalfPint1011. Der. Let’s be Pinteresting together.

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Experience: Dress.

Lisa just recently got engaged. She was in theatre with Aussie and I oh-so-gently chided her into giving me occasional guest post updates on her experience planning her Perth, Australia, wedding. Hopefully this is the first of many, as I know I’m entirely intrigued about what Lisa has on her adorable little brain for her November 2013 wedding day.

How freaking adorable is she?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Wedding Dress Shopping is like shopping for Venetian glass. Every piece is exquisite. It seems impossible to decide. But once you take a piece home, away from all the others, you realise the perfection, the simple details you couldn’t appreciate before.

I went wedding dress shopping for the first time on Saturday. I took my Mum, Sister and Nanna. It was such a wonderful time with the girls and one that I will never forget. We only had time to go into one shop on Saturday so I decided on Sarrisha’s located south of Perth, Western Australia. The shop is one of the few bridal shops that allow you to walk in and try on any outfit you want without an appointment. The atmosphere was relaxed and casual, making me feel comfortable and excited about the experience. I didn’t realise how big a deal it was until I went inside and started to feel really nervous! But soon enough I had 20 dresses in the change room and off I went!

The dress I had set my heart on looked lovely but just didn’t feel right. It was the last dress I tried on that I think might be the one … It was so beautiful and I felt so comfortable in it. Every girl coming in and out of the change rooms kept telling the dressmakers that they were planning to lose weight before the big day. They were picking outfits they thought would look better once they had lost weight. I laughed as I was no different. There is such a focus on losing weight and having the perfect wedding body. But when I put on the last dress it looked good on me right now, just as I am and I knew that was the dress I wanted; One where I didn’t have to sacrifice the fun times in order to look a certain way on the day.

I am not sure if I will even bother looking anywhere else because the dress is just perfect and besides, all the dresses are perfect in their own way. You could end up looking forever. I don’t think I need to put myself through unnecessary stress. Besides, my second favourite dress was a gigantic Scarlett O’Hara-style dress. It was massive and I could barely move. I looked like a giant marshmallow. If it wasn’t for the fact I could not move, I think I would have taken it on the spot! No one else liked it. But frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn! I felt wicked. Hehe!

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Truth.

I’ve learned some hard truths lately.

I’ve learned hard truths in the past, but it’s easier now. It’s easier now because I have someone I can share those hard truths with. My anxieties dissipate when I’m able to have those honest conversations, when I can share why those hard truths hurt.

Though he may not always completely understand why they make me hurt, just knowing he knows they affect me and is willing to be there when I need help moving beyond them helps.

It’s a big world, and we’re but two small people (har har), but knowing I have someone in my corner to help me, to love me and to trust me helps.

The hardest truth I’ve shared with him is that I will love and continue to love him through difficult times and easy times. It’s the greatest hard truth. It makes all the others, all the ones coming in from the outside, seem almost insignificant.

It’s really great when love helps hurt disappear.

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Spotlight.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I had another post in mind. But it hit a speedbump. Which is fine. I understand. But it brought up a valid point.

Weddings are intensely personal, private things. And yet, in the current technology-filled times, they aren’t. They’re on the blogosphere, they’re in the media. They’re EVERYWHERE.

Meg at A Practical Wedding wrote in a post some time ago about keeping some privacy in your wedding.

ESB tweeted about being super pissed if someone tweeted a sh*tty cellphone pic of your wedding.

Offbeat Bride has featured more than a couple weddings where the ceremony was just the couple and the reception included everyone else. Or where the couple whispered their vows to one another.

When our photos went live and our slideshow (have you watched it yet???) went up, I went crazy with emailing it to people and posting on Facebook. I even staged a viewing in my office.

But, some people aren’t that attention crazy. And maybe it’s not just about the attention.

For me, while (I’m an only child, so … derrr.) I do love attention, it’s more about sharing. Sharing with people who couldn’t be there, reminiscing with those that were. Sharing those great moments that not everyone sees on a day-to-day basis. Sharing something special.

I, personally, love to show everyone what an awesome time we had. How much love was in the air, how into karaoke we get and what a great bunch of people we had around us. I worked two damn years on the thing. Of course I want to show it off!

But there are people who would rather keep their weddings, marriages, intensely private. Who don’t want to share ideas, details or pictures. Who want to store them for their own little stash, to return to when they want to without people pestering them. To remember the moments for themselves without others weighing in or providing commentary. And that’s awesome. It’s special. And sweet.

Above all, the decision to shout about your wedding from the treetops or keep your photos hidden in a cubbyhole should be yours and your husbands.

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